Sunday, December 6, 2015

History Lesson DIY

I have always really loathed History. Even though some is kind of cool, it has bored me quickly. I have faked enthusiasm for my dear Grand-dad's stories and not learned a thing. I cannot remember important dates in my own history let alone in our great country. I, until this year, have gladly brushed this under my neatly swept pottery barn rug. Because who really needs to know what date WWII began or ended on and Where or Why, to get through life anyway. 

Now I have had some wonderful and brilliant teachers in my educational career. It is not their fault I have fell short in this area. I honestly do not even know where or when my distastes began. I really thought I would feel this way in regards to history for my entire earthly existence, and that was totally fine by me. 

However, nine years ago God gave me this son. He has changed my life in ways that seriously only God could explain. He has stretched not only my stomach to the point of no return but also my mind.  It took me a good 2 years to even realize what I was in for, another 2 years to harness this power for good. But the past 4 years the ride has been wild, fun, fast, furious but also extremely insightful and totally delightful. His modo, What is the point of fun if you learn nothing?

This most recent turn of events in which I have to remind myself to NEVER say NEVER! Like EVER! has been such a humble realization for me. This boy LOVES his history. I have willingly jumped in with all my clothes on and the water is cold!  I should have seen it coming. The non-fiction books, the refusal to entertain anything that was not truth, fact, proven, researched and written down, the disbelief in things of utter nonsense. Here I was trying to prolong the tooth fairy, the Santa, The freaking Elf, the Disney Darth Vader Magic. And there he was saying, "you realize that these things are not documented as proven people with dates in history nor have they had any impact on our world or country in the way of forward thinking" Doh! 

So I started paying attention. I started to listen,  to read with him, and God opened my eyes to what a rich and ridiculously cool history we have. As a family, as a nation, as a Universe, the path we have traveled to arrive at this current footprint is fascinating.  

So sorry professor so and so, but this 9 year old has got you beat when it comes to lesson! I have learned more in the past year than perhaps my entire 16 years in the institution. I remember speaking to his soon to be 3rd grade teacher at the end of last year and asking what the big research project would be on. Her response of American History received an eye roll and “ugh, boring” from me the MOM! Well goodness, I am sorry and boy has my tuned changed! I am so looking forward to seeing what J and his classmates teach me! Also, a huge apology to my Grand-dad, I knew those stories where so important and while I loved your sarcasm and the morals you eventually taught with them, I really wish I would have paid attention to the dates, the actual history of your activities. Perhaps we can discuss this when I meet up with you again. I know Jonah is looking forward to sitting down with you and hashing out the facts.

So, when my boy tells me that he is intent on being the one to win the Veterans day poetry read and speak at the assembly, I obviously believe him and have zero doubt of his success.  But time had gone on, and just today I started to panic that I would be picking up the pieces of his broken heart once the winner was reading their poem come Friday.  After his research and enthusiasm to learn more about our countries Vets and Branches of service…he would be crushed for sure.  But then I got this email. From the very woman who received my eye roll and boring comment last year. “Jonah is the K-3rd winner for Veterans day Poetry”

I cried. Also, I smiled. I am humbled by this man.

Thursday, July 30, 2015

The Death of Summer

I have only been a part of a few deaths, but they have all followed similar protocol. They have started abruptly, strung out for seeming eternity, then ended peacefully yet with deep deep sorrow that no matter the preparation I was not ready. The shock is always the easiest for me to overcome because i want to get in and be helpful and useful and forward moving. I have only been in the loop of carrying the burden of recovery a couple of times, but i have witnessed several loved ones do it. It is a heavy heavy load that is carried with ease, joyful heart, sorrowful forgiveness and exhausting supplies of God's energy and adrenaline.  The close relationships of family and friends that are in place only become stronger and the peripheral gets pushed even further.  The death almost seems a relief to those care giving and those suffering, except it is NOT. It is deep pain and sadness. Did you do enough, did you love hard, did you forgive, did you laugh, did you create a bond that will last eternity? 
This is summer for me every. damn. year. 

Summer comes like a bucket of cold water at 6am. Fast, hard and way too early for my personality type.  So of course I am up and running and have the world as our oyster before the first espresso has been polished off.  Adventures abound, so much to see, so much to do now that we are the masters of our own schedule. Come mid summer we have given ourselves enough fun hangover days that we have settled into the frat life. Breakfast at 10, lunch at 3, maybe we get dressed and live it up until midnight..or maybe we never shower until Thursday...pool counts right?  This is the sweet spot of summer. I could live here forever. But there is always that nagging thing around the corner that keeps us from lingering too long. It is like a persistent rash. #school 
And now here we sit with rice on our tux and only one week left of summer. 
Dream Paralysis, Panic, Frustration, Sadness. 
Did I do enough? Did we laugh, did we see? Did we sing, dance, love? Did we strengthen our shell to withstand another 9 months of arrows being shot at our armor? Did we build enough? 
my heart is heavy. another year of enthusiasm to summon up. 

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Banana Camry

I have been depressed. In a funk. Lost my MOJO. 
Not the straight jacket off her meds kind of depressed, but instead more the Bobby finds the tiki idol and then buries it again for the next family to find when they visit the island on their dream Sandals Vacation type.  So I knew it would pass, but Man...While i was in it, the days drug on, the weeks seemed very stressful and i slept NONE. Finding your mojo after you've lost it on the sandy beaches of Oahu can seem impossible and I was letting myself become overwhelmed and lost in my childrens' vocabulary words all too easily. The humdrum of daily routine, the melancholy mornings. The doppio esspresso was even failing me.  Seeing Kanye all crouched down and watching people sing I assume he felt the same as I did, ducking from the hubbub, listening to the tumult but not hearing his name. I needed to shake things up BADly, but how. "Will I ever laugh again?" Thinking surly the answer would be no! But then just like that, I saw Mojo. I mean it was unmistakable and blatantly displayed for me to pick up and carry on. And so I did.  Finding that thing has brought a smile so needed and the sun feels like it is shinning once again.  So I am sure you are now dying to know where my mojo was....Oh, you know. It was in the kayak, shoved in this guys Camry driving down the street. I totally forgot i put it there. Thank You (insert Jimmy Fallon music) Banana Camry, for returning my zeal for life today. Watching as it drove past me top speed on the way to who knows where since there are NO oceans around. But the joy you have brought will carry me through. You knew exactly what it would take...but seriously, what a sense of humor. Good call, God. Good call.